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I’m back from what I have described as one of the wildest things I’ve experienced this year.
I did ayahuasca.
I went to be fixed and changed. To be rid of grief, confusion and heartbreak. To have clarity. To be sure. To be a better person.
I had questions. Loads of them. Most of these went unanswered or weren’t answered in a way I can make sense of.
But what I did experience (out of the many) was a pouring into my heart that shot through my entire body. And I kept asking for more, more, more. And it kept pouring and pouring and pouring. It felt like it could never run out. Like I could never be too greedy.
This is a description of unconditional love.
I haven’t gone into a lot of detail about my experience. I’m back nursing similar anxieties and fears, but something has definitely changed/shifted, and it becomes clearer as each day passes.
Here’s a few:
I don’t feel like ‘fixing’ myself right now. I’m tired.
I currently don’t care why I chose to come here (by here, I mean earth). I’m here, and I just want to be present to it and make the most.
The idea of finding my purpose doesn’t quite hit the same…
My heart feels more open. I feel someone could fall in it and not return (the same). I want to be intentional how I use mine and treat the hearts of others.
I don’t have any questions for you this week, but if you want to know more about my experience or even get to know me, speak to me. You can reply directly to this newsletter or here: elisia.traveller@gmail.com
I’m happy to share the things I haven’t shared here (because there are a few). I want to reiterate before you reach out that I’m sharing my own personal experience and it might be very different from other people’s journeys, so be mindful of this.
I don’t want to sell dreams…
Take it easy xoxo